Why you need to be vulnerable in marriage!

by - June 19, 2018

Marriage is an interesting thing honestly, let me just tell you the reality of marriage and being someone's partner is so much different from what we see out there. Now being married 2 years (still very much a baby in this game lol) but I have learnt so much about myself, my partner and just what it takes to be a good wife. One thing I have definitely had to learn is being completely vulnerable and really stripping these expectations I had come in with, in marriage everyday is different there are good days, and bad days and the longer you stay married to someone you are constantly learning about this person and every day a new layer of that person comes about. I remember when I was single I had this idea of what I would be as a wife, but then you get married and the reality of that sets in, you learn so much about yourself and you start to realize that all you had planned in your head just won't work now. I believe in order to have a successful and true marriage you are gonna have to be vulnerable, and that is in every single aspect of it.

Image by: Kimberly Marnell
  • Communication, I talked about this in my post about why i feel being a mom is harder than being a wife (check it out if you haven't) but one thing I have learnt is how pivotal authentic communication is key to having a strong marriage, but really raw conversations. Once you get past that lovey dovey phase in any relationship and start to deal with true life issues then your conversations will have to be deeper and you are gonna have to talk about those things that really affect you. The walls are gonna have to come down, and you might even have to have one of those Kim Kardahian ugly cry moments lol
  • Trust and building trust, guess what as you get to know someone longer people evolve and grow and you are having to rebuild that trust with each new chapter. No what kind of foundation you build your relationship on, everyone is human and insecure and with insecurity comes trust and some times even doubt. An example for me is becoming a mom, and my body changing prior to being a mom I never really thought much of my body or feeling uncomfortable in but then I  had kids and brought life into this world and things change and guess what I am insecure about that part of myself now, but I am learning to own it and not let it consume who I am but it is something I am having to learn to not be guarded about and let my husband understand and love this new body and person as well. 
  • Sexuality, listen sex is uncomfortable I don't care who you are you can fake it till you make it but being completely naked with someone is pretty vulnerable and just as open as it gets. When you marry someone though you get to share this part of yourself with your spouse and with every changing to your body and even yourself they get to see it all. 

As I learn more along this journey of marriage, I am becoming almost this new person. I in no way think its a bad thing, I am growing and learning to reveal new layers of myself and its very interesting. One thing I have learnt for sure in the last two years is vulnerability doesn't mean weakness, some people have it a lot easier than others but I think its such a strong thing that is definitely needed to have a strong marriage. What do you all think?

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  1. Very valid points. I'm still a baby in this marriage business but I can agree with every point you've made. It's a constant case of learning and adjusting. Choosing each day to be open to evolving and loving your partner.