Raising Confident Little Girls

by - June 14, 2017

A few weeks ago, I was doing my 4 years old hair and she said something very interesting that got me thinking about how I am raising my girls and the changes I need to make moving forward. Anyway back to the story, so while doing her hair on the bottle of the hair creme I was using on her hair is a drawing of a black woman with very curly/full Afro in an  up-do, she looks at the picture and goes "mommy she has ugly hair" I look at the picture and then I look at her and I say what do you mean? She then goes "its not beautiful like Elsa's" I was so confused and honestly wasn't sure what to say in that moment. Yes of course Elsa has beautiful hair I am not disagreeing with her on that but, my shock was more on the fact that she didn't think this black woman's hair depicted beauty or that she felt this pale white character with long blonde hair was more beautiful than the black lady. So when I finally got my thought together I asked her, why she thought the lady in the picture's hair wasn't beautiful like Elsa's, I then made a point to let her know that the lady in the picture had the same type of hair as hers, did she not think her hair was beautiful?

That moment wasn't only a teachable moment for her, but also for me because it got me thinking what am I showing as representation for my girls? What am I teaching them? Your kids learn from not only what you tell them, but also what they see. And we live in a world where thanks to the internet and social media beauty and standards on beauty are all one set standard and I don't want my girls having to live their life thinking there is only one type of beautiful. It's funny when I got pregnant the first time I wanted so badly to have a girl  and to dress her up and do her hair and just have my own life size barbie, but being a parent is obviously more than that but...... being a parent to a girl is extra more than that (lol that's not good English kids). I don't have the tips to raising confident little girls in our social media driven world, and every child is different, but the biggest take away for me from this experience is that I have to be the role model that I want my children to have. What I want my children to learn and see in the world is what I need to depict to them every single day. Society already makes it hard enough to be a girl, as a parent I need to make it just a little easier on them and be ahead of the world in molding them.

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  1. Your girls are absolutely beautiful! I think raising confident girls is so important. I have 2 nieces and they are definitely growing up to take over the world :)

  2. Thanks for sharing this very good post. For me growing up I was surrounding by diversity and learned to adapt with people and their cultures. Now as a adult I appreciate that upbringing because it allowed me to love me and my culture. But yet understand others as well. Let your adorable daughter know she is beautiful and also allow her showcase her being among other cultures so they can see how amazing she is as well����

  3. You raised some great points in this post! Its so important to be confident.

  4. I really enjoyed reading this! It's amazing to me what kids pick up at such a young age. There are so many negative messages hidden in mainstream media, and it really can impact what little girls think of beauty. The fact that you're thinking about this and tuning in to your girls tells me you'll be the role model they need. :-)
    Cheers, Sarah Camille // SCsScoop.com

  5. This is such a great post! Our children look up to us in more ways than we can ever know and more times than will ever know! I don't have a little girl but I know my son is always watching!