Going the distance: how I made long distance work.

by - July 03, 2016

Photo by Sobia Deen Photography

As most if not all of you know, I recently got married and still enjoying the bliss of newlywed. But previous to that my hubby and I were in a long distance relationship. It's so funny because every time people ask me how we met and I start to tell the story, people are usually stunned by the fact that we were in a long distance relationship for so long and got married. So I thought I would take some time to speak on my story and how we made it from long distance relationship to husband and wife.
My husband and I met in the fall of 2010 while I was taking a girl's trip to Dallas, and ever since then till the day we became officially husband and wife we were in a long distance relationship well other than the short time I moved to Dallas for about nine months( that's a story for another day). So here are the few ways we were able to make it from long distance to marriage. 
  • Set your exceptions right off the bat: I will be honest I didn't do this when I first entered my relationship hence why our relationship was dragged out so long. But you need to have that conversation off the bat, especially when you notice things start to get more serious. You want to set your expectations for what you are wanting out of the relationship, how long will you do the long distance deal before someone has to move, what you can take and can't take. Because you don't want to waste your time being in a relationship with someone for a year or even more and your expectations are not aligned and you are not working towards the same goals. 
  • Set in your budget the money for baecations to see each other, but also know that you are not in your average relationship: with a long distance relationship you will be sure to do a lot of back of forth traveling and its not always so cheap. While me and my hubby were dating, we tried to see each other every other month and lord did we spend a lot of money on those tickets. But even with those it never seemed like we saw each other enough. So definitely plan for those visit and set into into your budget and expectations how much and how often you both will be willing to spend. Its also important to know that you won't be able to see each other as often as you would like to but, learn to make those trips worth it. And if your exceptions are set then you know this won't be forever. 
  • Trust and communication: This is the most important thing, relationships are hard no matter if you are in a long distance one or local, but when in a long distance relationship you will deal with even bigger tests. So you have to communicate, I would even say over communicate because this person isn't there to see your emotions and there might even be days when you only get to talk to them for a few minutes the whole day so communicate about it all. Trust is needed in any relationship, and when in a long distance relationship that is when the true test of trust plays  a part. I think if you are constantly communicating, then it go hand in hand with trust.
All in all, long distance relationships are hard and it takes a lot of commitment, but a the end of the day just remember if you believe its worth it then you will be willing to put the work into it to make it work. If any of you have ever been in or are in a long distance relationship, I would love to hear your story and what are some tips you used to make it work.

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