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Alot .Of. Tola

Lifestyle Blog helping young moms to balance motherhood, family, work life, friendships and self care.

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Motherhood is one of those point in a woman's life that doesn't quite come with a handbook or manual on how to handle it. You literally are winging it everyday and hoping you are doing a good job. And it can be quite a transition to go from being pregnant and now having a baby to take care of, everyone talks about the physical parts of getting ready for a baby, and all you will need to make the transition easier for yourself and baby, but no one talks about how to mentally prepare for baby and lets be real that's the part you need more than anything else.
  • Understanding that there will be a lifestyle change, no matter how little or big of a change when you have a baby you can expect that your life will change in some way. Understanding that certain luxuries and freedoms might be a limited, or are just gonna have to be put on hold for the time being due to a new baby. Also simple things like what you eat, even clothing will be affected, understanding that some of these changes might just be temporary and some permanent. Most importantly just knowing that when it could take you 5 mins to grab your stuff and get out of the door, might take about a good hour now lol. 
  • Priorities are going to change, when a baby is added to the equation your life literally feels like it has stopped being about you and now about this new baby. So understanding how to prioritize things now, knowing when sacrifices are gonna need to be made, and learning to balance this new role with your life as it was before. 
  • Have a clear understanding of the responsibility that is going to be entering your life, everyone knows that motherhood is definitely no walk in the park, but also no one also realizes the reality of it all. Having conversations with other moms, asking questions and just getting a clear understanding. A strong support of other mother's is so needed to be able to share with and learn from.
  • Understand that postpartum health looks different for every woman, this is something most women still struggle a great deal with in society. According to the CDC 1 in 10 women experience symptoms of postpartum depression and a lot of the time, most women don't even know what these symptoms are. So just understanding that your postpartum journey and healing won't be the same as the next woman, so just talking to your doctor, and having a strong support system to see you through those bumpy rides. 
  • Knowing that relationships will change, this is one that I had to really come to terms with. When you become a mom your life really changes and some of those changes affect relationships and friendships you have fostered over time. So be able to know when a friendship or relationship is dead and be open to letting it go. If not for anything but to enter this chapter of life with ease. 

Its quite an adjustment when you have a child for the first time, sometimes it can feel like you have been through a roller coaster ride, but I think the biggest lesson I learnt when I became a mom was knowing that my mental state as a mother was most important. Speaking up when thing didn't seat right with me, asking for help ALWAYS  and just taking each day at a time. There is no mothering manual that comes with your baby, you learn something new everyday, so just be ready to learn and grow.
 What is something or what way you have learnt or are learning to prepare for motherhood?


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When you become a mom, one of the top things you worry about is who you can trust to leave your child around. Especially for working moms who sometimes have to head back to work as early as 6 weeks after having a baby, so I wanted to share a few tips to be able to pin point the perfect daycare or child care option that will work best for you and your family.

  • Know what all your options are, with child care these days there are endless options from a live in nanny,to drop in care to a traditional day care, Montessori, or just a baby sitter. The selection is so vast that there is an option for anyone out there. Research what each option has to offer, how does that fit with your family core values. Look into cost, how does that fit within your budget, location just how far is the location from you that will play a factor especially if need to drop off and head to work. Also ask questions to friends, and thorough online research can really give you a lot to start with, always remember google is your friend!
  • Once you narrow your options down, then Plan visits to the location. Its so important than you not only use the word of mouth referrals but also go in and get a good view of where you will potentially be leaving your child. Ask all the relevant questions such as daycare policies (ex: sick day policy, nap time, feeding etc) Use this visit to pay close attention to how the caregivers interact with the kids, as well as class sizes. 
  • Consistency, be sure to make sure the nanny you are picking is providing at least a year of commitment. And if you are choosing a facility, then be sure to make sure the teacher in the classroom has been working at the daycare for awhile and also what turn over rates are like in the facility. Research shows that babies need consistency because it helps them form a secure attachment with their caregiver. 
  • Ask Questions!!! You can never ask enough questions. It makes the most sense to make a private interview with either the nanny or the director of the facility you intend to drop your child with, and have a few sets of questions written down to ask and get clarification on. (DOWNLOAD MY CHILD CARE QUESTIONNAIRE BELOW)
  • Most importantly go with your gut instinct, if something doesn't seat well with you then always go with that and don't hire someone just for that reason. 

Its hard having to leave your child in the hands of someone else that isn't you and it can be quite nerve wrecking. But sometimes life calls and you will have to either leave your child in the hands of daycare to get back to work, or in the hands of sitter for a night out so knowing that you are leaving them in the hands of someone you can trust and they will do the job as close to what you would do is always comforting. I would love to know your thoughts on leaving your child in the hands of a daycare facility or nanny and what has your experience been like with it?




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