How to Allow Motherhood Stress, Affect Your Marriage

by - November 08, 2018

Being a mom has its fair shares of stresses and can feel quite overwhelming to deal with. But the biggest mistake you can make as a new mom and wife is take that same overwhelming and frustrating feelings and dish them on your husband. Being a newly wed is alright quite an adjustment, but then adding on a new born to that equation can be hard on a couple but realizing that you are both in it together and dealing with everything that comes your way with that mentality will make the transition a lot easier. Here are some simple advice for new moms to not allow the everyday stresses of motherhood to affect your relationship with your husband.

  • Be on the same page about the kids, one of the major ways that the drama from the kids can affect your relationship is by not both being on the same page. Even the simplest things can turn around and cause a big fight, maybe one person says one thing and then the other partner says something else that will cause friction between each other. 
  • Communicate about the difficulties you face with the kids, If you are anything like me you might trying to be super mom and try to fix everything on your own or just carry a lot of the burdens by yourself. But the reality is that is how you get overwhelmed and then you get mad at your spouse for not understanding those feelings. There are some days I am with the girls all day, and they literally work every ounce of patience I have, and my husband gets back and they are like angel babies to him (the perks of having all girls, just not loyal to mommy lol) So when he gets back I fill him on the day and because he has a fresh perspective his able to talk to girls in a different tone or even help me see the ways I could have approached things different. 
  • Have your own relationship outside of just the kids, being a parent is a full time job and honestly you can never ever clock out from the job. But if you want to be able to have a stress free relationship, you are going to have to mentally check out from parenting even if its just for a couple of hour focus on each other and your own relationship independent of being parents. 

At the end of the day you will have to remember that your relationship was there before the kids came along and in other to continue to grow that relationship in the right way you will have to learn ways to differentiate your feelings towards whatever happens with the kids, from what happens in your relationship. Trust me this is so much easier said than done, because they are so closely aligned but that's the reality of being in a marriage and having little ones. I would love to hear how you all keep the drama with the kids from affecting your relationship with your significant other?

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